Overcoming Unwanted Intrusive Thoughts: A CBT-Based Guide to Getting Over Frightening, Obsessive, or Disturbing Thoughts

Overcoming Unwanted Intrusive Thoughts. I think this is a valuable resource for clinicians and OCD suffers. I’m a strong believer that individuals who experience difficulties with OCD need to be given multiple resources from various sources throughout their treatment to help them better understand intrusive thoughts. I believe that this book helps provide valuable insight on such topics as how everyone experiences intrusive thoughts, how sometimes using self-talk incorrectly can lead to compulsions, the importance of observing thoughts and letting them go, and how energy spent thinking of a thought may make them ‘sticky,’ and more difficult to let go. The triggers for intrusive thoughts are varied and often unique to the person. The usual culprits are stress, anxiety, or external triggers like that person who cut you up in traffic that morning. Some mental health conditions, such as Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder (OCD), Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD), depression, and anxiety disorders, can also trigger intrusive thoughts. But before you start worrying, let's clarify: intrusive thoughts are common. In fact, nearly everyone experiences them at some point in their lives. They're part of the weird and wonderful tapestry of human thinking. It's when these thoughts occur on a regular basis, become too loud, too disturbing, and or start affecting our daily life that they become a concern. But there is a way to manage them. Ever noticed how it's easier to deal with something when you're fully present? That's mindfulness. It involves focusing on your breath, the sensations in your body, or the sounds around you to cultivate an awareness of the present moment. This awareness allows you to observe your thoughts, including the intrusive ones, without reacting or getting swept away. These thoughts don't define you. Label thoughts: Observe intrusive thoughts without judgment and label them as "just thoughts." Try a guided technique: A simple breathing meditation can help you to stay grounded. Instead of reacting emotionally to an intrusive thought, simply acknowledge it for what it is: a thought, not a fact. This creates distance between you and the thought, reducing its intensity. By labeling it, “This is just an intrusive thought, not reality” you weaken its power and prevent it from spiraling into distress. Use a neutral phrase: Say to yourself, “Oh, there’s that thought again,” instead of engaging with it emotionally. This helps reduce its significance. Imagine the thought as background noise: Think of intrusive thoughts like a radio playing in another room—you don’t have to listen or react to every single sound. The more you resist, the stronger it tends to become. By allowing the thought to exist without reacting emotionally, you take away its power. Over time, this "allowing" approach helps the thought lose its grip, making it fade naturally. Use the "observer" mindset: Imagine yourself as a curious scientist or a neutral observer, simply noticing the thought without engaging with it. Remind yourself that thoughts are not facts: Just because you have a thought doesn’t mean it’s true, important, or requires action. Let it come and go like a passing cloud.

I’ve dealt with intrusive thoughts since I was a young teen (of course, at the time I didn’t know there was a name for them- I just thought I was insane.) They have varied in theme. A few weeks ago, I was triggered by something in the media that popped a thought into my head that threw me off very badly. It caused panic attacks that kept me up at night. I couldn’t eat. I couldn’t function at all. My husband would get home and I would just sob because I couldn’t cope. I was stuck in the OCD trap of mental rumination of asking and answering question after question with reassurance that only made the thought grow stronger and come up with “even worse” what ifs. I could recognize that it was an intrusive thought, but I had zero idea of what to do about it. Recognizing that it is intrusive is just, unfortunately, not enough. I was so desperate and hopeless and I was starting to think I wouldn’t have a happy future because of this thought- or a future at all. I truly felt like I was in the trenches of hell. I discovered this book after doing some research. I read the negative reviews and almost didn’t purchase it. I decided to anyway, and I am incredibly happy I did. The negative reviews aren’t giving this book the credit it deserves. This book is much more than just “ignoring the thought”. In fact, you’ll learn that actively trying to ignore it is actually fueling it. This book starts by teaching you about the normalcy of intrusive thoughts and will take you through some types that people have. It WILL be distressing to some people who don’t experience thoughts of such severity. I personally do, so it was somewhat comforting to see. There are sexual, harmful, etc. There are unfiltered examples of these thoughts which I am very happy about, because for most people, myself included, Intrusive thoughts can be incredibly graphic. The authors then begin to teach you about the *reaction* to the thought creating an anxious hurricane within you, not the thought itself. It WILL be hard to grasp this concept. Stay strong. You will learn about myths about facts that you may believe, and that I believed when I first started reading the book. There is a Q and A about these thoughts that answers common questions such as “why do the thoughts feel like impulses?” And “I get so scared and the fight to control myself feels so real. Why?” This was incredibly eye-opening for me. I think everyone needs to hear what the authors have to say about that phenomenon. Essentially, it is an anxiety-based illusion, but they get more into the science of it that is super important for intrusive-thought-sufferers NEED to hear. This aspect of experiencing intrusive thoughts can be the most challenging for many. Next is a section that I consider to be the most helpful. It goes over the actual process in the brain that creates to and reacts to these thoughts that makes them such a b*#*# to deal with. Once again, incredibly eye opening. I really started to understand why I was having such a hard time with this thought and why I was panicking and running around in a frenzy when it would pop up. They explain why common strategies that we try to use just don’t work. They give the thought too much power. Even trying to tell yourself the thought is false or having a negative reaction to it actually encourages it to stay by telling it that it is significant. There is so much more that goes into it so BUY this book to learn more about this, but as I’ve said so many times, it’s eye-opening. STOP reassuring yourself. Absolutely none. Not even “that’s false” or “I would never do that”. It does not help, even though you think it is the right reaction to such awful thoughts. Trust me on this, I struggled with this at first too. The authors give names to the voices in your head that grapple with the thoughts and really do a wonderful job at showing you how the questions you try to answer after analyzing the thought (worried voice) are never going to be satisfied by your answers or reassurance (false comfort). They make up dialogue between the two about different thought categories and you will begin to see how this creates a chaotic cycle within your mind. Finally, they start telling you what to do. It’s too much to get into, but it DOES take courage and strength. They lay it all out for you. They will tell you what to do. It is very simple, but it takes a lot of work on your part. They also touch on ways you can bring the thought up and practice without waiting for it to pop in. This is what we are all scared of: exposure. But trust me, they will tell you what to do both when the thought is existing on its own and when you are purposefully bringing it in to practice what they are teaching you. Stick with it, trust the authors and trust yourself most of all. It SUCKS. It’s hard. It will seem counterintuitive. It takes tremendous strength and bravery. They will tell you what you will feel and how to handle it. The anxiety will be intense- they will tell you what to do and how to do it. I have hope that with this book you will learn about your entanglement with your thought, what to do about it, and build tools for an encounter with a future thought. I am nowhere “cured” and never will be. That’s not the goal. I am actually still working with the thought that I have been haunted by the last few weeks. It takes practice and courage. I am still working on my recovery and it will be a journey. But for the first time in a month, I feel hopeful. Buy this book. Be brave. Thank you to the authors for this gem.

I will keep this as a night-stand book to refer back to regularly until the habits are natural. Explains, in-detail, why your attempts at stopping the thoughts keep failing. Shares different information than I've never received from a therapist (even CBT-trained therapist). As a Christian, I am cautious with psychology books; sometimes they take a purely humanist perspective (denying any spiritual realm). I found this to be helpful, neutral, and sensitive in explaining how combatting irrational, intrusive thoughts with an aggressive/fighting disposition (even with using prayer and Scripture) can mistakenly cycle more anxiety by giving the thoughts weight. You can trust God, but also, unintentionally, be feeding a cycle of anxiety by validating intrusive thoughts; the authors speak about how sometimes people have a crisis of faith from doing this. Purchased "Needing to Know For Sure" as soon as I finished this. Will likely buy the "Overcoming Anticipatory Anxiety" too. Here are a few notes I made about the book: I recognize that whoosh was "first fear." I can’t control first fear. This is the amygdala doing its job. It’s normal. First fear can be caused by subconscious thoughts. But thoughts are just thoughts. Thoughts are not facts. Thoughts feel real only because of the emotion I place on them. I will not explore, entertain, or try to solve a problem connected to the thought. I will allow and accept the thought. By validating if it’s true or false, I give weight to the thought. I will not give False Comfort a voice because it feeds Worried Voice and creates more anxiety. You can’t reason with Worried Voice because, unrealistically, Worried Voice demands 100% assurance when tunnel-visioned. I choose to "accept and allow” the thought, which is more of an attitude than technique. I will float above the fray by removing myself from a turbulent experience: holding a neutral, third-party perspective on my thought; it is the opposite of entanglement. Floating is a non-distressed, uninvolved, and non-judgmental perspective. You view the thoughts from an emotionally-removed perspective. The feeling of urgency that comes from intrusive thoughts is a false message; allow time to pass with the thought—in an unrushed accepting response —is how to stop it. Emotional discomfort does not mean real danger. The thought that it might come back is just another intrusive thought. It does not matter if a meaningless thought comes back. The most effective ways to rob thoughts of power is to continue doing what you were doing before. Acceptance is an attitude of allowing the thoughts and not a technique for stopping them. If I am checking if I’m having the thoughts, I’m not accepting. Acceptance is when I don’t care whether the thoughts are there or not because they are unimportant or worthy of attention and because they don’t matter. This reduces anticipatory anxiety, reduces avoidance, and cultivates okayness in the mind.

The mind can be an interesting place. I especially love my thoughts when I'm reading and I'm able to organize my thoughts into a review. That seems creative and productive. What I don't like is when I leave the house and my mind says: "Did you turn off the curling brush?" Of course when I go back and check I always have unplugged it and it is put away. So why does the mind specialize in creating anxious thoughts that take up time and energy. What purpose could there be? This book gives clues as to how the mind works. The mind sometimes feels like it has a mind of its own. What if there was a process that would alleviate mental suffering and cause these types of intrusive thoughts to mean nothing? Anxiety seems to be what most people are experiencing these days in our fast-paced, stressful world. Anxious thoughts are quite common and everyone has them. The trick is to know how to deal with them on a daily basis. The authors of this book believe there is nothing wrong with you (with a few exceptions at the end) and that you have actually trained yourself to deal with negative thoughts in the wrong way. What you've probably been doing is engaging your mind in a battle and therefore reinforcing the thoughts so they never go away. I tried the simple technique in this book and it was like the thoughts and images melted away. I felt less anxious almost immediately when I tried the technique and understood the psychology. Some people have said that "thoughts are things" but really they are just "thoughts passing through." If you want to manifest reality you have to do a lot more than just think. This book emphasizes how we can make intrusive thoughts mean less and not worry about them so much. So if you are dealing with anxiety or OCD, this book might help. If you are having suicidal thoughts however, please contact a medical health professional as soon as possible. You may need medication to deal with your thoughts and anxiety. Don't be afraid to get help if you really need it. ~The Rebecca Review P.S. The last time I left the house I did not have the thought. Yay. Maybe this method really works. I have been just saying to myself: "That is just a thought, it is not important." and then I say: "Whatever!" It seems to be working. Works for all other unwelcome thoughts too. The trick seems to be making the mind realize that each thought is not equally important. This book is a key part of the puzzle of figuring out the mind. P.S. This book also has some information on lust and I think the best source for information on that is Jesus. This book is a bit soft on the topic.

Absolutely life changing. If you have anxiety and have ever experienced intrusive thoughts or worries, or even THINK you might, buy this book. I read this book cover to cover in 2 days and plan to read it again. I plan to email the authors to thank them. As a nurse I think very logically, and having a physiological and psychological explanation as to what occurs in the brain and then specific tools and exercises to practice retraining how your brain processes information and reacts to thoughts was exactly what I needed. This book was truly a lifeline I wish I’d had many years ago. If you’re on the fence, just buy it. You won’t regret it.

I have been dealing with OCD and intrusive thoughts in some form for nearly my entire life. Over the past year, it had gotten to the point where I'd often become so anxious with my obsessions, that I wouldn't want to leave the house or go do anything, and would just puzzle through things for a couple hours. After a couple of counselors (one excellent, one useless), I came across this book. I'm generally skeptical of self-help books, but given the authors' credentials, I thought I'd give it a shot. I'm very glad I did, because from the first chapter, it was clear they knew exactly what they were talking about. Their descriptions and examples were so accurate, it was as if I wrote them myself. Some features of this book: - Plenty of examples: You're very likely to find your particular worry in here, or something very close. - Scientific background: The book is very accessible, but any claims the authors make are based in valid scientific research. The authors provide proper names to some of the causes and symptoms of intrusive thoughts (and sometimes citations) so it's easy to do your own research and find bonafide scholarly papers back up their claims. This was especially helpful for a skeptic like me. - Very practical advice: The authors provide specific steps for dealing with intrusive thoughts as they happen, and for the long term. There is no wishy washy meditation, and no crap. These techniques led to immediate and dramatic results for me. Dr. Winston and Dr. Seif: If you ever happen to read this, I'd like to sincerely thank you for helping me get my life back. I used to have a terrible spell of anxiety for a day or two every week, and now I occasionally have a small setback once a month or so. I can actually wake up in the morning and expect to feel like myself throughout the day. Even if that's where my improvement ends, it was well worth the $10 price of admission.

I have been battling pretty awful OCD for roughly 2 years now. I have dealt with it in the past, but it got the worst I've ever known a year after having my daughter. This book is wonderful. It uses a CBT-based approach to overcome all types of thoughts. I got a lot of use out of it when I was dealing with intrusive thoughts, and I've also found it to be helpful with other issues I was dealing with. Basically, summer 2017, I began dealing with 24/7 dissociation. I had become obsessed with feeling dissociated, derealized and depersonalized. I didn't think this book was going to help with that because it was more a sensation than a "thought", but it does and will (since I realized that thoughts go along with the dissociation, "this feels awful. is everything around me real? why do I feel like I'm in a dream? etc). Unfortunately, I'm now dealing with health anxiety and am constantly obsessed over the fact that I am having or could have a heart attack or stroke at any moment or that I have some underlying illness (diabetes, heart disease...you name it). I've gone to urgent care multiple times and they assure me it's just anxiety, but I still get pretty scary and consistent symptoms (heart palpitations, dizziness that has made me practically house-bound unless someone else is here to take me out, chest pains, numbness in my limbs, feeling like my face is drooping when it obviously isn't, and shortness of breath). I know that it's all just anxiety, but the underlying thoughts when a symptom pops up "oh gosh, I'm dying, something is majorly wrong with me, I need to go to ER or urgent care RIGHT NOW, why do I keep getting dizzy if there's truly nothing wrong??" fuel the symptoms. Then, when I'm not having a symptom, the thoughts still persist, "I'm not feeling dizzy now...but....any moment now, it'll hit me again. It's nighttime...and this is when I typically get those awful and scary palpitations...let's see when they'll start this time...."I'm hoping that this book helps in the same way that it did with the dissociation and the intrusive thoughts. It's a shame that when you have OCD or anxiety, sometimes you think you're over one thing and something else pops up!! I also wanted to say in this review that Dr. Martin Seif has been nothing short of professional and helpful. When I was in the throws of my constant dissociation, I would email him directly to ask for help and how to implement the techniques in this book to my unique situation and he ALWAYS replied personally to me within hours or a few days. As a busy professional, he didn't have to do this, but he did - he doesn't even know me and always reached out to me. I have to thank him tremendously for all of the help he's been! I'm tempted to email him about my health anxiety issues, but I know deep down what his answer is going to be and what the answer truly is and that is "THIS BOOK WILL HELP, JUST KEEP READING IT AND PRACTICING THE TECHNIQUES!". Good luck to anyone out there struggling mentally. Mental issues can rob you of your happiness, willpower and joy of life. I would have never thought that the worst my anxiety and OCD would be would be right after having my first child...which should have been the happiest time of my life, not the most difficult mentally. I've come to realize that my issues are almost all focus or obsessive-related. The more I obsess and fight with the thoughts, sensations or whatever might be bothering me at the moment, the more it causes anxiety and panic. Unfortunately, simply knowing this doesn't help; it does require practice and persistence, but it's obtainable. Thank you again and I fully recommend this book!!

What a great book. It was easy to read, entertaining and practical. I have studied anxiety and thought I knew all the best approaches to manage unwanted, intrusive thoughts. But this book argues that past approaches of distraction, positive thinking, and reframing actually serve to perpetuate the dialogue between the part of the mind that worries, and the part of the mind that tries to comfort and offer assurances. The conflict between these two parts is inevitable because the things we tend to worry about the most tend to carry some degree of risk. Even though the thing we worry about is though against the odds of happening, it is always possible, even if only at a 1% chance. So the mind will continuously look for ways to find certainty, and this only perpetuates the distress, rumination, and anxiety. As such the book advocates an attitude and approach of acceptance, which through practice will diffuse the dialogue between the worried mind and the false comforting mind, and the pattern of intense repetitive intrusive, thinking subsides.

Very Good and very important content.

Very interesting read. Gave me more understanding.

I very rarely leave reviews but this book has compelled me to do so. I have been really struggling with overthinking and intrusive thoughts recently, this book has made me realise that its completely normal, its took the scariness away from it and made me rationalise my thoughts, a life saver! The authors totally get it, its informative, reassuring and doesnt shy away from talking taboo subjects to ensure that all intrusive thoughts are captured and normalised!!

Helpful hints about dealing with sudden scary thoughts.

After i read this book my life changed, no exageration. It was a complete mindset changer. Totally recommended to anyone struggling with intrusive thoughts, it might not be for you but it was totally for me, just try it out.