Emotional Intelligence: Why It Can Matter More Than IQ

In “Emotional Intelligence”, Daniel Coleman justifies the importance of emotional intelligence (or E.I.) in all areas of life. To help us understand what is happening when emotions occur, the book begins with an explanation of emotions and neural circuitry. As Coleman goes further into the topic, we learn why emotional literacy is extremely valuable in our love, family and work lives. Most importantly, this book offers helpful approaches on how to improve one’s emotional aptitude and fix negative emotions. I would recommend this book to anyone interested in psychology, well-being, or personal development. Likewise, I believe that this book would be extremely useful for emotional personalities who are affected by chronic anger, anxiety, or depression, and who are looking to improve themselves by better-understanding their emotions and learning how to handle them. My brief takeaways from the book: What Is E.I.? Coleman discusses emotional intelligence as one’s ability to identify, understand, and handle emotions in oneself and in others. There are two aspects to E.I.: internal and external. Internally, competencies include self-awareness, self-management, impulse control, mood regulation and more. Externally, E.I. relates to empathy, social awareness and the capacity to manage emotions in others. The Brain Coleman explains how emotions are highly dependent upon one’s neural circuitry; in particular, the balance between her “feeling” amygdala and “thinking” prefrontal cortex. The amygdala is the part of the brain that triggers emotional impulses and fight-or-flight responses. The prefrontal cortex is the emotional damper that inhibits impulses while simultaneously facilitating attention and working memory. An amygdala overwhelmed by emotion and unable to be regulated by one’s prefrontal cortex can trigger what Coleman calls “neural hijackings”. Neural hijackings contribute highly to emotional deficiencies such as anxiety, anger and depression. A portion of one’s neural circuitry is genetic, but Coleman argues that temperament is not destiny. The brain is continuously shaped throughout a lifetime due to its neuroplasticity. The Emotions Emotions are physiological responses of the brain. Good moods and emotions help us stay motivated, optimistic, resilient, and resourceful. They contribute towards an ideal state or flow and facilitate our ability to think flexibly and associatively. “Laughing, like elation, seems to help people think more broadly and associate more freely, noticing relationships that might have eluded them otherwise…” On the other hand, negative emotions such as anger, anxiety and depression can drastically impede our working memory, intellect and performance. “Emotional Intelligence” focuses on the most common negative emotions: anger, anxiety, and depression. Each of these emotions is a different type of emotional hijacking on the brain. Coleman discusses, in detail, the treatment for such concerns. In short, solutions include methods such as self-awareness, cognitive reframing, and distraction techniques to fight toxic trains of thought before they ruminate further. “Anyone can become angry – that is easy. But to be angry with the right person, to the right degree, at the right time, for the right purpose in the right way – that is not easy.” In The Real World A significant portion of “Emotional Intelligence” discusses the effects of emotionally illiteracy on the most important areas of our lives: relationships, family, work, school, and health. These chapters include numerous studies and examples on how emotional competencies affect one’s ability to be an effective manager, teammate, spouse and parent. Most importantly, emotional states play a significant role in one’s physical and mental health. Coleman discusses the correlation of negative emotional states, such as stress and depression, with one’s susceptibility to (and ability to recover from) disease. For example, social isolation can affect mortality rates as much as smoking, high blood pressure, high cholesterol and obesity! E.I > I.Q. “Those who are at the mercy of impulse – who lack self-control – lack a moral deficiency: The ability to control impulse is the base of will and character.” Without discounting the fact that I.Q. is indeed important, especially for lower-rung technical jobs, Coleman debates that E.I. contributes significantly more to one’s overall success and quality of life, especially in “soft” domains such as health, love and relationships. In a family, it’s E.I., not I.Q., that influences how long a marriage lasts or how a child handles adversity. At the workplace, everyone at the top of the ladder is already filtered by technical expertise. So it is E.I. that helps the best and most effective leaders stand out. From a societal standpoint, an emotionally intelligent community will breed a moral culture where decisions are influenced by empathy and moral instincts as opposed to uncontrollable impulses. “Academic intelligence offers virtually no preparation for the turmoil – or opportunity – life’s vicissitudes bring. Yet even though a high IQ is no guarantee of prosperity, prestige or happiness in life, our schools and our culture fixate on academic abilities. Ignoring emotional intelligence, a set of traits – some might call it character – that also matters immensely for our personal destiny” If you've found this summary interesting. You should definitely go deeper into this lovely, informational book!

I don't usually find myself buying or reading books labeled "Self-Help." Not that I don't like myself, or consider myself unworthy of help--or beyond the realm of needing help--but I find the books labeled and marketed this way to be largely vapid and boring. This was not the case with Daniel Goleman's Emotional Intelligence. This is a thoughtful, sober, and careful analysis of specific issues related to character formation and the steady slide of young people in society into a situation of being incapable of articulating, let alone controlling, their passions--as they would have been called in the 18th century--and directing their attentions and efforts in pursuits likely to lead to productive, healthy, and contented lives. What could be more urgent and important? The book details interesting scientific discoveries, data from studies and experiments, and intelligent and non-pedantic descriptions of complex phenomenon with ease. While offering ideas for solutions, Goleman is never so obnoxious as to pretend that providing training in emotional intelligence to young people will solve all of society's ills. In an age of mass shootings, youth nihilism and despair, and generations lacking the ability to toss their phones aside and pay attention to something for more than two minutes, focusing on a way to drive home the usefulness and almost unlimited upside of character formation (which Goleman concedes is actually what he's talking about at the end) seems a tremendous imperative. While the book begins with philosophy--where the answers ultimately lay--Goleman hopes to avoid that field by keeping the majority of the book in the hard(ish) sciences. However, if he wishes to succeed in reforming education along the conservative/classical (though thoroughly secular and traditionally liberal) lines he proposes here, he will need to get a bit more explicitly philosophical. There, I fear he will collapse into a heap of utilitarianism and collectivism and squander the good that this book hints towards and wishes to promise.

The font of the letters are too small to read...unfortunately

A must read and apply for teachers and leaders who are actively involved with ‘shaping’ students and followers who are groomed by them. Spontaneity and self control both are required in good measure to shape ‘character’ of a person and parents and teachers are responsible for this from a very young age. The book discusses all the aspects that help a person to improve his Emotional Intelligence and a teacher to use EI in ‘educating’ children.

É um livro fundamental para a vida de todos nós. Não é um best-seller de autoajuda, mas uma reflexão profunda, assertiva e baseada em pesquisas com rigor científico conduzidas por décadas. É uma leitura transformadora à medida que abre nossos olhos para verdades pouco difundidas ou completamente negligenciadas sobre inteligência emocional, cuja ausência propicia a maior parte dos problemas de relacionamento, de segurança e de saúde nas nossas sociedades contemporâneas.

When first released, the author was a pioneer in this field. Therefore, to those who consciously or unconsciously already make use of their emotional intelligence in various everyday situations, this book may seem to state the obvious. However, if like me, you're interested in unbundling the skillset and understanding it better, then you'll find this book of real interest. As many other reviewers have said this is not a guide to developing Emotional Intelligence, nor a self help book to help you in desire. Goleman sheds light on our life and our different ways of thinking. This book explores how Emotional Intelligence is a key factor in determining personal as well as professional success. The author explains how individuals who are able to tap into self-awareness, self-discipline and empathy are usually happier, healthier and more successful with personal and professional relationships than individuals who are unwilling or unable to learn what motivates people.

A very enlightening read. Enjoying learning from this book.